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Channel: Reflections from the Depths of the Mind
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The ease of self pity!

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Everybody goes through difficult times in life and times when life just seems to be beating us down!  Take the two cats above, Popeye, the orange tabby, was brought into the clinic when he was only a few weeks old.  Found floating in a tree well with his sister after a storm and brought in for us to “take care of” whatever that entailed.  He was unconscious and his eyes were so infected that pus was running out of them.

It was a very busy morning at the clinic and we were prepping for a c section and I had one of the techs give them some SQ fluids with dextrose and a touch of penicillin and wrap them in a blanket in a heating pad.  I honestly didnt expect them to live.  When we got done with the c section they were actually starting to move.  We put them in a kennel, two blind kittens and gave them some milk and mushed up food.  They slowly started to eat over a few days and the female actually had one good eye but Popeyes eyes had been destroyed by the severe infection.

After a month or so we started letting them run around the clinic.  Popeye would follow his sister and he learned his way around the clinic.  He and his sister ran everywhere and he did fantastic.  We spayed and neutered the both and found the sister a home with some fantastic clients.  Popeye we knew we needed to keep because he had only ever known the clinic and he knew how to get around it.  Popeye has never felt sorry for himself!  He is probably our most friendliest cat and one would never guess that he couldnt see if they couldnt see his scarred up eyes.

Purr is the little grey kitten next to him.  She came in because she had been used as a chew toy between two dogs on the indian reservation.

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This is what she looked like the first day she came into the clinic.  This was around the end of september.  Since that time she has undergone multiple surgeries to remove dead skin and try and get the wound closed.  The last one was about 2 weeks ago.  Through all of this she just purrs and loves and never feels sorry for herself!

It is so easy to start feeling sorry for ourselves!  I have been letting myself do this for quite some time.  The horse racing season started in Tucson a few weeks ago and I agreed to be the vet for them.  This means working 7 days a week for 10+ hours a day every day for now 6 weeks with no days off.   This will mean 47 days in a row with no breaks, no down time, no extra rest, just work work and work and more work and it is work.

I have been lamenting this fact and feeling extra tired and extra whiny for months now.   Yesterday I read a blog that I had been following for a month or so now about a young man who was an extreme outdoors man who had an accident and is now paralyzed.   (Click on the highlighted area above to read his blog.)   His post was about his dreams and how in them he could still walk and run and use his legs.  He wrote about how frustrated he was when he awoke and had his legs that did nothing and couldnt move on their own.

I left a comment, if I read a blog I always try to comment, about how I thought it was wonderful that he still dreamed he could walk because to me it meant that his subconscious hadnt given up.  He commented back  “Yes I’m not one for self-pity at all. I want to sometimes get so pissed off and shout from the rooftops and tell everyone how bad I have it, but I just tell myself to suck it up and deal with it. That being angry and jaded will do nothing to help my situation and that only I can help myself. And then I feel better…most of the time. ;) -AB”  I spent the morning pondering on this statement!

Here is a man who has lost pretty much everything that he loved, he lost his joy and his living and his peace, everything!  He has every reason feel sorry for himself and be down and yet he isnt!  Who then am I, healthy and able to walk and make my own decisions to get myself into things, to whine and feel sorry for myself because I agreed to work!

Think about it, I bet you that 90% of people who get caught up in self pity and depression are in that state because of choices THEY made!   A bad marriage to someone they chose to get married to.  A bad decision at work that cost the their job.  A bad decision to get pregnant when they couldnt afford or emotionally support a child.  A bad decision to take a drug that they became addicted to!  A choice to not work hard enough in school to get into college.  A choice to lazy and not go and work even at a job that you dont want to do.  They are ALL choices that one makes!  The problem is that nobody wants to take responsibility for their bad choices!  Instead they want to feel sorry for themselves and blame someone else or the government or society or whomever!

Even if your life is hard and it is NOT your fault, what do you get by feeling sorry for yourself?  Is it doing anything for you?  Is being angry or jaded or full of self pity helping you in any way?   It has never ever helped me, only kept me down and full of self pity and bitterness and ruined my life!

We should get our eyes off ourselves and our problems and purpose to do something for someone else!  When we take the focus off of ourselves and set out to help others it is amazing how many people you will find who have life a heck of a lot worse than you and they arent complaining or bitching or feeling sorry for themselves!   I read a blog last week about a 25 yo beautiful young woman who is dying from cancer and yet she had the most beautiful video talking about hope and love and acceptance of what is happening!  Who am I to whine about having to work too many days in row!  I will at least be alive and still able to work!

Thank you Arash and Abigail and many others for being a bright and amazing light in this world full of self pity!

 



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